Real Talk About Living in a Fat Body
I can’t find clothes that fit. I’m embarrassed to swim. My partner isn’t attracted to me anymore. My doctor says I need to lose weight. I am worried about fitting in an airplane seat. Real answers to real problems with living in a fat body.
Why I had 13 Rabbits
There was a time in my life when I had 5 dogs and a newborn. And a full time job. Oh…and 13 rabbits.
When people gaped at this revelation, I would just shrug my shoulders and act like it wasn’t a big deal. To me, that level of chaos and stress felt totally normal.
Why is it so hard to change your life?
The reason it’s so hard to change the way you think and behave is because we are wired not to. Keeping things the way they are is literally in our DNA. So when your super smart logical brain comes up with an idea that will surely improve your life in some way, your subconscious mind slides in and goes, “Not so fast, superstar!”
Stressing About Food is Not Actually Normal
Let me guess –
You sit down at a restaurant and immediately worry about whether you’re going to be “good” by getting a salad or “bad” for getting a burger.
You eat the “perfect” breakfast and lunch, but come home and inhale a mountain of cookies before…
![Silky, Scrumptious [EASY] Veggie Soup](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6520231058a19809eacdc8a9/1713189870975-05Q9WZFXNH4M852WFK1D/veggie+soup+ingredients.jpg)
Silky, Scrumptious [EASY] Veggie Soup
This is an easy, creamy, delicious soup that I make all the time. It’s perfect for lunch or serve it with some crusty bread and maybe a green salad for a comforting weeknight dinner. I can’t say enough about how much I love this vegetable soup! It’s SO good and SO easy.
You Don’t Have to Say Anything at All
It’s not your job to make everyone understand what you’re doing or approve of you and your decisions. Your primary job is to honor and respect yourself, and protect your peace and mental health.
Is the size of your stomach a medical condition?
Maybe your body is wise and helpful and supportive, and shifts in your shape mean something other than that you are a gluttonous maniac who can’t stop eating.
Maybe the shape of your body -- and the size of my stomach -- isn’t a medical condition, but an emotional condition. An emotional COMFORT, even! A shelter, a sanctuary…
3 Ways to Stop Hating Your Body Right Now
The negative thoughts come automatically and unconsciously, so it takes deliberate effort to turn things around. You can control the way you think, the things you do, and what you say to yourself at least part of the time, and the more you practice positive self-care and self-talk, the more natural it will become.
Will I Be Fat When I Die?
This notecard is tacked beside the desk of a petite elderly woman who has just moved into assisted living. This woman is brilliant, had an impressive career, and lived an independent, wealthy, enviable life. When I saw the “127 Pounds” beside lists of books she wanted to read and pictures of places she’d visited and lists of goals she had for herself, it broke my heart a little bit.
Why the Scale Will Always Derail You
If you are a die-hard scale devotee, I understand how important that ritual is to you right now. It helps you feel like you’re in control. You’re almost a little addicted to the drama of discovering today’s number. You can’t imagine going through a day without knowing the “truth” about what’s going on with your body. I completely get it, because I lived that way for years. The damage of weighing myself really crystallized for me one day about 8 years ago, and the impact was so dramatic that I haven’t been tempted to weigh myself since.
Twice Baked Potatoes with Bacon and Extra Cheese
This recipe is in my regular rotation because it’s inexpensive, easy, and leaves lots of leftovers. Also, it features cheese and bacon, so it’s obviously delicious.
But I Can’t Just Eat Whatever I Want!
Here are 3 things to keep in mind when you’re trying to figure out HOW to be flexible around food AND take good care of yourself.
Make Cooking Fun Again
Even if you’re never going to want to spend hours in the kitchen whipping up gourmet meals, learning to cook even a few things you love will enhance your relationship with food and may even empower and inspire you in surprising ways.
Why Eating More Frequently Makes You A Better Person
Your body and your brain need consistent food to keep you healthy and happy. Eating frequently and promptly respecting your hunger signals is the prescription for feeling crazy around food, managing your blood sugar, and keeping your weight stable.
Healing Through Food
Creating peace around food means that there are no rules. There’s no prescribed way to eat. All foods have some value, and every choice you make is entirely valid. Nutritionally dense foods are not better than foods that exist primarily for visual or gastronomic pleasure. When you have this level of absolute freedom, you are creating space to reconnect with your innate wisdom around food and find genuine satisfaction.
Potato soup with bacon & cheese
Potato soup with cheese, bacon, and sour cream
But I have to lose weight for my health!
There’s a lot of evidence that losing weight and keeping it off isn’t possible for most people -- you really need look no further than your own experience, most likely. And each attempt to lose weight messes with your metabolism and appetite over the long term -- it’s not a benign act. Let’s talk about why focusing on weight loss derails you from your actual goals.
5 ways to stop hating exercise
Ah, exercise. The bitchy cousin of dieting. Does the very word just fill you with dread? We’ve come up with all kinds of clever phrases to trick ourselves into doing it -- joyful movement, anyone? -- but the fact is that this is still the one area of self-care and overall wellness that every single one of my clients has struggled with.
the worst thing i ever made
I have never made Thai food before, but I figured I could follow a recipe and it would at least be passable. The main appeal was that I had most of the ingredients already in my kitchen, so it felt like a no brainer. I was wrong.
sydney’s sage advice
When I sat down to work on this piece yesterday, I asked Sydney what I should write my weekly email about.
“Tell them how I was a late talker but I turned out just fine, which means that everyone is different, and that it’s fine to be exactly how you are.”